Here is a fantastic comment by DTomboy at FDR. Greg went through his usual motions of derailing a conversation by acting like a smug, socratic ass, and dtomboy called it out.

Dtomboy wrote:

When you guys put on your little Socrates outfits and start asking your clearly pre-formatted questions, can you tell me why you put that annoying Thanks! at the end of your posts? Thanks!

To which Stef then has to step in and defend his honor!

Stefan wrote:

Well that was pretty rude.

See? It's not rude to be disingenuous, and to use rhetorical strategies to win an argument, but it is rude to point out when other people do.

Dtomboy wrote:

I think (only my opinion of course) that some people here view the socratic method as a way to "trap" people, rather than being about both sides learning and I guess those feelings came out in this post. I almost edited it before I went to bed, but was too tired. I'm obviously still working out my issues of how I felt when I first came here and started reading posts where people did not seem to be treated all that well and were asked to leave. I was also uncomfortable with some conversations that I saw happening on the Gold forum as the group talked about some posters who were not donators and it seemed to be talking behind people's backs. I know there is a back and forth with that LiMi board but at least those people say everything out in the open.

I read that last night...I enjoy her candor. Greg deserved that verbal smack back and papa SmurfM looks rediculous jumping in and what? protecting? rediculous... My favorite line is "at least those people say everything out in the open".

and now the end is near...

I'm so glad she called him on his copying of Stef annoying and condescending "Thanks!" and happy face after obviously adversarial posts. I friggin' HATE that. It's so obviously fake and insincere.

Stef wrote:

I don't know about Greg of course, but I use 'thanks' as a way of deflating any possible perception of confrontation in my questions.

But really, in effect, it means he can be confrontational, condescending, rude, dismissive or whatever, and then by adding "hope that helps," or "thanks!" or a smiley, he's off the hook for it, no one can criticize him. That's how it looks from here, anyway.

_________________
Please check out my blog!
Dylboznia

It is interesting to look at myself in the mirror as I feel the deep disgust and revulsion I feel towards Stef's dishonesty, manipulation and hypocrisy. Since that which we find fault with in others is often a reflection of our own issues, I wonder what this is trying to tell me. If anything. I'm pretty sure there's something there, now just to figure it out...

- NonE

NonE- I think it is telling you your human. I don't think it is telling you you are the same as or equal to. I dislike when I fall off the considerate ladder but in actuality- I don't think noticing others falling means I am falling too. It may mean we are aware and/or recall the times we fell or were pushed...non?

Yeah, sometimes things upset us because of the negative effect they have on us, not because of some failing in ourselves.

Yeah, I always thought that whole "that which angers us most in others is that which we are ashamed of in ourselves" deal was a way for the guilty to indict the innocent, as if their evil would never bother us if we were truly pure. What kind of sense does that make?

Did I offend? I'm sorry if I did.

I have always experienced that argument from authority figures as a way of ending the conversation. The sort of grown up version of "I'm rubber, you're glue, whatever you say bounces off me and sticks on you."

No. I did not consider that offensive in the slightest. I was sharing a thought. So were you. That's why we're here.

But let me take this moment to suggest that you and I seem to be talking on different wavelengths. I was specifically examining my own thoughts and reactions and pondering if there was something that I personally could gain from them. You, on the other hand, are mentioning "argument from authority" and such. I did not, and DO not, imply that there is any judgment from another, not in any fashion. It is all personal inquiry, for my personal benefit, and mine alone, at my discretion and subject to my own evaluation.

The reason I mentioned it here in this public sphere is that I thought it an interesting idea, and that perhaps others might as well. That is all. I was not implying anything, nor attempting to "lay a guilt trip" on anyone.

A friend of mine from another forum (who frequently lurks here) has often pointed out how much his anger at someone else often reveals (to himself) some of his own shit, and I have found that very true and well worth consideration. So my comment here may have simply been a way of "giving back," as it were.

Does that clear it up some?

- NonE

I have also found it to be often true. Especially when you have a *strong* emotional reaction about something that other people don't seem to care about that much. I think in those cases often asking yourself "why is it that it annoys me so much" can sometimes reveal that it is reminding you of your own faults.

Sometimes not even a current fault but maybe one you used to have and worked hard to get rid of, the behaviour of the other person is reminding you of your old self and you are repulsed by it.

Of course the rule is not always true. I feel disgust at genocidal dictators but I don't secretly want to slaughter races

Haha yeah... I mean maybe it actually does reflect my real desires... I have fantasised about shooting people like obama right in the head before... but it wouldn't do any good. he'd just go down in history as a hero.

Wow... is Dtomboy banned yet? there's a lotta posts about him/her/it, but I haven't seen one saying she's got a banning yet.

when's it coming?