Favorite swear words and phrases

Conrad · Subject: Favorite swear words and phrases Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:01 pm

peeps,

I'm looking for more original ways to insult people or wish them ill, so do you have any particularly funny or interesting ways of swearing at people?

I recently used 'I hope you starve...' which I found quite funny cuz of its specificness and out-of-the-ordinariness

lemme know yours

Phlogiston · Number of posts: 624 Location: NOLA Registration date: 2007-10-25

I don't need any ways to insult people. I seem to do just fine without even trying. Smile

100,000 sperm and You were the fastest?

How many times do I have to flush before you go away?

It appears you have a severe case of assholio.

Conrad · Subject: Re: Favorite swear words and phrases Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:35 pm

Phlogiston wrote:

I don't need any ways to insult people. I seem to do just fine without even trying. Smile

100,000 sperm and You were the fastest?

How many times do I have to flush before you go away?

It appears you have a severe case of assholio.

see, from a comedy-technical point of view, these are okay phrases, but they seem too, I don't know, 'contrived'. The best phrases are ones that flow naturally, but come with a twist.

Dylboz · Number of posts: 2058 Registration date: 2007-09-20

Son of a motherless goat.

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Nielsio · Number of posts: 708 Location: Amsterdam Registration date: 2007-08-19

http://digg.com/odd_stuff/The_9_Most_Devastating_Insults_From_Around_the_World

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Conrad · Subject: Re: Favorite swear words and phrases Sat Jun 21, 2008 1:28 am

the ones Nielsio linked tend to suffer from two problems: unnecessary profanity and lack of a twist

I did really like this Serbian one

Quote:
[b]"May your house be live on CNN" (Da bog da ti kuca bila na CNN-U)--this essentially means I hope NATO will bomb your house.
[/b]

Phlogiston · Number of posts: 624 Location: NOLA Registration date: 2007-10-25

For a twist I think Marx was best (thats Groucho). Not that they are so good as remarks to use directly to someone.

"He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot."

"I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up."

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."

He always makes me laugh.

I love that serbian one.

Anne la Jordanie · Number of posts: 90 Age: 20 Registration date: 2008-02-26

One of my favorites I usually use in jest with those familiar with history is "I wish you had married Henry VIII."
Another good one is "Dumber than Tink's dildo."

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Phlogiston · Number of posts: 624 Location: NOLA Registration date: 2007-10-25

I love the Henry viii one. I am not familiar with Tink or the relation to the dildo. Could you please give some background?

Anne la Jordanie · Number of posts: 90 Age: 20 Registration date: 2008-02-26

It's from a book. It's said by a pixy. Tink is a shortened version of Tinkerbell.

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Static4367 · Subject: Re: Favorite swear words and phrases Wed Jun 25, 2008 8:01 pm

Only a knob would start a thread like this

Conrad · Subject: Re: Favorite swear words and phrases Thu Jun 26, 2008 2:14 am

Just now I had a practical problem (involving drying laundry) and expressed my confusion to Zebra, and she gave the solution that was completely obvious but that I somehow hadnt thought of, and she then said 'Just stick with me bro, you'll do okay' which I found very funny

in another context and I probably posted this in another thread already, a friend of mine once told me: 'I don't care what people say about you, I think you're okay' which is friggin' hilarious (cuz of the paranoia that the supposedly comforting statement provokes)

Alex · Subject: Re: Favorite swear words and phrases Mon Jun 30, 2008 1:06 am

Anne la Jordanie wrote:

It's from a book. It's said by a pixy. Tink is a shortened version of Tinkerbell.

Tink's Dildo must be a reference to Pinnochio's nose, and so we have the complete objectification of man in his manipulated (by a narcissistic and emasculating mother) form as a pure sex object. What could be more brilliant?

Me, I prefer: "Slot". It says its all.

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Alex · Subject: Re: Favorite swear words and phrases Mon Jun 30, 2008 1:07 am

Conrad wrote:

Just now I had a practical problem (involving drying laundry) and expressed my confusion to Zebra, and she gave the solution that was completely obvious but that I somehow hadnt thought of, and she then said 'Just stick with me bro, you'll do okay' which I found very funny

I always find that kind of thing funny too. ZF is a winner. She put you off your guard once again, and comforted you in the bargain.

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Once I busted out the phrase "Tri-County Dick Mangler" and I've been using it ever since.