My brother is going to die of starvation and/or dehydration. It is a cruel fate, devoid of dignity. Why can't we, his family members, say goodbye, make our peace and then call in the medical professionals to administer a fatal dose of narcotics or sedatives? Why must we wait and watch as his body fights against the effects of starvation and lack of fluids? It is an awful, horrid fate, and a sad state of affairs in a so-called civilized nation. Are religious people so disgusting, so evil, so fucking cruel that they think this kind of suffering has virtue? That they'd use force to deprive my brother of at least a peaceful death devoid of painful suffering is revolting! Why?

They are not actually evil. They have been broken like your parents and like your brother and like you have been.

It's a sad and tragic situation, that's for sure.


Is he still aware at all?

it is revolting and the people advocating it are seriously deluded at the very least.

I'm sorry for what's going to happen Dylan. What does your brother look like now, like he's asleep? or different? And what's his name?

(also, and this may sound incredibly dumb, but has there been a 'second opinion'? other doctors from a different hospital looking at the scans and him?)

My brother is dead now. But he was unconscious for almost 9 weeks. He had terminal hypoxic brain injury. The thinking part of him was long gone, but we had to watch the body waste away.

My mother just died a month ago. I sat with her for her last day. Except for the apneia or constant suffocation she was free of pain. Yet the outcome was guarenteed. I couldn't help thinking how easy it would be to choke her painlessly and end the suffering. I would have easily done the same for a pet but culture said I shouldn't do this with a human and would punish me. I thought of the movie Million Dollar Baby as I waited vigil for her last dying breath. I see Dr. Kevorkian as a true hero now.
Sorry to hear about your brother.

Man, it sucks to watch people die! I'm so sorry to hear about your mother, just know I can empathize. I only wish I could have talked to my brother, so I could know more about what happened and why. He left a lot of questions. When his mother killed herself, it was obvious why, and she even left a sort of "Top 10" list of reasons to commit suicide. My brother's death remains a tragedy for me, regardless of whether it was an accident or intentional. It was so out of the blue. At least with the terminally ill, there is some time for everyone to come to grips with the inevitable as was the case with my Granddad, but Taylor was only 18! I hope your mother's death wasn't so sudden that you didn't have time to say goodbye and make whatever peace you needed to make with her and the situation. We had 8 weeks of rollercoaster emotions hoping my brother might recover, but he never once regained consciousness. Would it have been easier or harder, do you think, he she been taken from you in an accident or somesuch?

Phlogiston, I'm so sorry about your mother's death. I don't understand if she was conscious and coherent on her last day, with you there. Were you able to communicate and say goodbye, express love (if you felt it), obtain closure?

My mom died from a fungus that grew very rapidly. This was a complication from chemo for leukemia. She didn't know until the day they called to tell her she needed to come in immediately. 3 weeks later she died.
I did have time to communicate with her. On Sunday she was weak but lucid. On Monday she could spit out 3 word phrases. On Tuesday she could squeeze your hand and move her left arm. I said my farewells then. So I was able to say goodbye. From that point communication was obviously extremely limited and probably mostly misunderstood. When she grabbed at the oxygen tube was it to say say remove it, I can't breath or its bothering me?
It was a hard night. The last weeks were definately surreal. Afterwards there was an empty space. Thats really about it.
It was about the same as knowing my car was being stolen only much more intense. I would compare it to a chunk of your life simply dissolving and vanishing and the clap of the vacume slamming shut behind it. The bigger the space inside your life the bigger the clap.
To me all unresolved issues didn't linger. They simply became non-issues. I can understand how one would hate not saying goodbye to their brother. To me this is not an issue between a person and their brother but an issue inside the person. As an atheist I cannot see an issue between a person and a nothing. Thus for me the issue ceases to exist.
Yet I must say it still bugs me ten years later that I didn't smuggle in a bear for my grandma on her death bed. What bothers me is that I didn't listen to my inner voice instead of the "rules". I feel like I caved in to the wants of others and sold my true values away. I didn't have to worry about that this time.
So now you know what my situation was and what thoughts and insights I came away with from my perspective.
Thanks for caring.

So how does this relate to euthenasia?

How does this relate to euthanasia? It's related because I stole Dylboz's thread, thus painlessly killing it.

Sorry. I should have branched into a new thread.

Yeah that question I wrote at the bottom was my attempt to steer it back.
I am not sure how but I thought my comments about death and relationship might work in with the euthenasia part.
I was hoping someone might integrate it.

Sorry if I got too personal, it's all very fresh for me, and I go between wanting to talk and not even wanting to think about it. I wanted to relate to you, to empathize, and maybe get some empathy back, because it's just comforting to know someone else knows how I feel. Again, I'm sorry. Also, I feel terrible about your loss, all I can say is, I know how you feel. I'm so, so sorry.

I didn't mind the personal side. I can agree with the empathy part also. I didn't speak in terms of emotion because I think emotional terms are a personal vocabulary and only vaguely translate from person to person. For instance if two people feel bad I still think each is feeling something very different from the other.
What did you think of my metaphor of the vacume clapping shut. Did that resonate with you?
Did my response about lingering issues being within instead of between the person and the deceased one help you? I know my brother was struggling with the decision of when to come see my mom. He really couldn't afford to come back more than once but he wanted to be there for her at the end. I found that struggle interesting to watch. The nurse advised him that my mom might not live long and he started defending his reasons for leaving again with this nurse. This was before we knew there was no chance for recovery. He was stuck with the dilema of leaving when she might die and then being able to come back later to visit if she recovered and was dying later or staying longer now for her dying days and not being there for her later if she needed him. I told him it was a gamble and to make the decision he felt was best for him and not worry about the nurse. I think that is what he did. He guessed correct so its hard to say if it was choice that would have put him at peace if he was wrong.